I may have done well as a mum
Asian mums are known to be tigers. I am no exception, even if my son was born and raised in the West. I expected him to excel in school since I perceived him to be intelligent. Not the case at all. I (and to some extent - he) went through so many of his scholarly disappointments. But I never wavered in my belief that he will get through the rough patches and end up finishing school no matter how long it takes. I have often blamed myself for the below par results he kept bringing in. Did I not push him hard enough? Did I push him too much? Was I too lax? Was I too strict? Did I pay enough or too little attention?
However much I may have failed in guiding him towards academic excellence I think I made up for his character. For no matter how many times he fails, he keeps getting up and trying all over again (at my nudging, of course). Take for example the theoretical driving exam. He failed five times, even after reviewing from a book, taking 12-hour-lessons and a couple of other extra lessons. Six is his lucky strike and boy was he elated... and naturally, so was I.
Knowing how failure feels early on in his life, I hope it gets ingrained into his head that it is only a temporary setback. Just an experience to learn something from. Just a step away towards success.
Watching him interact with his female friends is just lovely. He treats them with respect and their fondness of him is visible. He plays bodyguard to his friends when they go out to party, as he is the one who least suffers from the effects of alcohol intoxication. I love this caring side of him. I hope it is something he took away from my example.
We treat each other like buddies, slapping each other playfully, exchanging cruel jokes and sarcastic observations, sharing memes, singing along to his music... But when I get enraged and demands his immediate action on certain important things, he obliges. He is still terrified of his mum, even at the age of nineteen. He still acknowledges my superiority and follows my lead.
At the end of the day, we are roomies who need to live together out of necessity and the best way to get through the situation is making it as pleasant as possible.
However much I may have failed in guiding him towards academic excellence I think I made up for his character. For no matter how many times he fails, he keeps getting up and trying all over again (at my nudging, of course). Take for example the theoretical driving exam. He failed five times, even after reviewing from a book, taking 12-hour-lessons and a couple of other extra lessons. Six is his lucky strike and boy was he elated... and naturally, so was I.
Knowing how failure feels early on in his life, I hope it gets ingrained into his head that it is only a temporary setback. Just an experience to learn something from. Just a step away towards success.
Watching him interact with his female friends is just lovely. He treats them with respect and their fondness of him is visible. He plays bodyguard to his friends when they go out to party, as he is the one who least suffers from the effects of alcohol intoxication. I love this caring side of him. I hope it is something he took away from my example.
We treat each other like buddies, slapping each other playfully, exchanging cruel jokes and sarcastic observations, sharing memes, singing along to his music... But when I get enraged and demands his immediate action on certain important things, he obliges. He is still terrified of his mum, even at the age of nineteen. He still acknowledges my superiority and follows my lead.
At the end of the day, we are roomies who need to live together out of necessity and the best way to get through the situation is making it as pleasant as possible.
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